The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the WorkplaceDr. Gary Chapman is known for his first book, The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate, which offered couples “simple and practical ways to communicate love.”1 In 2011, along with Dr. Paul White, he released a new book called, The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace: Empowering Organizations by Encouraging People. “This book helps supervisors and managers effectively communicate appreciation and encouragement to their employees, resulting in higher levels of job satisfaction, healthier relationships between managers and employees, and decreased cases of burnout.”2  

 

There are a couple of ways to determine your primary language.

 

1) If you purchase the book, it “contains an access code for the reader to take a comprehensive online MBA Inventory (Motivating By Appreciation) – a $20 value.

The inventory is designed to provide a clearer picture of an individual’s primary language of appreciation and motivation as experienced in a work-related setting. It identifies individuals’ preference in the languages of appreciation. Understanding an individual’s primary and secondary languages of appreciation can assist managers and supervisors in communicating effectively to their team members.”3

 

2. You can take the “Discover Your Love Language”4 assessment at 5LoveLanguages.com. This free tool will provide you with your primary love language which is basically the same as your work language. It tells you how you prefer to receive love and appreciation.

 

According to Dr. Chapman, these “primary languages tend to stay with us for a lifetime.”5

 

The takeaway is that you have a primary way of expressing love and appreciation AND each person around you does as well. You may not speak the same language and that could cause communication and relationship issues. By understanding your primary language and the languages of your coworkers, you’ll be in a better position to communicate effectively. While you may not be able to have every person take an assessment, if you listen, you’ll be able to determine anyone’s primary work language.

 

Let’s look of at some examples of how each work language is represented in the workplace.

 

Words of Affirmation
“Words are the most common language of appreciation used in the workplace. Three parts make an effective compliment: using their name, telling specifically what they do that you value, and why it is more important to you, your organization, or your clients.”6

Indication: Person is frequently asking for feedback.
What you might hear: “Is this what you wanted?” “Did I do this right?”
Actions they might take: Give frequent appreciation to others.

 

Acts of Service
“Appreciation communicated through an act of service is doing a little something that makes a colleague’s day go better—opening the door for them, offering to bring them something from the break room or supply room, or staying a little late with them to help finish up a project.”7

Indication: Person is frequently asking for help in doing or getting something.
What you might hear: “Would you do this for me?” “Can you bring me that report?”
Actions they might take: Treasures written thank you notes, i.e. has them displayed. Holds the door for others.

 

Receiving Gifts
“Tangible gifts at work are not bonuses or raises; rather, they are small items that show you are getting to know your co-workers at a personal level. Consider picking up a magazine related to one of their hobbies or interests—gardening, running, cooking, or about a sport they follow.”8

Indication: Person enjoys receiving things.
What you might hear: “You didn’t bring me anything from the cafeteria?” “Look at the plaque I received for completing my class.”
Actions they might take: Bring you some brownies they made. Gets you a cup of coffee without you asking.

 

Quality Time
“In the workplace, not everyone who values quality time wants individual time with their supervisor—some people are shy and can feel intimidated by a more outgoing supervisor. Often, going out to lunch or hanging out after work with their colleagues is the type of time desired.”9

Indication: Person is always asking for more time with you.
What you might hear: “Do you have some time for me to talk about the project today?” “Can we pull everyone together for a quick meeting?”
Actions they might take: Hosting birthday parties for those in the office. Hanging out with coworkers after work ends. Build trust and rapport with teammates and managers.

 

Physical Touch
“When appreciation is communicated through physical touch, it is usually a form of spontaneous celebration—a high five when a project is completed, a fist bump when a problem is solved, or a congratulatory handshake when a sale is made. You usually can’t plan it but you can make it enthusiastic!”10

Indication: Person likes to be in close contact with others.
What you might see: High fives with coworkers. Patting coworkers on the back or shoulder.
Actions they might take: Handshaking, fist-bumping, sitting close, and hugging.

 

 

Summary

The quality of your interactions with managers and coworkers has a direct impact on employee engagement. By better understanding and utilizing the 5 languages of appreciation in the workplace, you can increase the effectiveness of communications, build better teams, and ultimately increase engagement.

For more information go to:
5LoveLanguages.com
AppreciationatWork.com

 

 

 

1 “About Dr. Gary Chapman.” The 5 Love Languages. Northfield Publishing. Web. 17 Mar. 2015. <http://www.5lovelanguages.com/about/gary-chapman/>.
2 Chapman, Gary D., and Paul E. White. “Overview.” The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace: Empowering Organizations by Encouraging People. Chicago: Northfield Pub., 2011. Print.
3 Book Overview: The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace: Empowering Organizations by Encouraging People
4 ibid.
5 “Love Languages FAQ – #3 Does Your Love Language Change as You Get Older?” The 5 Love Languages. Northfield Publishing. Web. 17 Mar. 2015. <http://www.5lovelanguages.com/faqs/love-languages/>.
6 “Practically Speaking.” The 5 Love Languages Newsletter 1 Mar. 2015. Northfield Publishing. Web. 17 Mar. 2015.
7 ibid.
8 ibid.
9 ibid.
10 ibid.

 

 

What do you think about the five languages of appreciation in the workplace? How can you use this intelligence to communicate more effectively? Make entries in the comments log below.

 

 

Let’s Engage!

I’m Agent in Engagement Simpson…Gregory F Simpson.

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